Thursday, July 5, 2007

The Sisters Meet

Ok, let's hope I can type this because my hands are shaking. The reality presented itself to me today in the form of three children, all at once.

I'm a little scared.

Nope. I lied. I'm terrified.

The day started with me waking up and my husband going back to bed. My other two girls, the baby and the three year old, were still at my mothers and due to come over this afternoon. June Bug and I played while I tried to unpack. Each time I left the room, she wailed. Now at the hotel, she had stopped doing that. She was comfortable there and knew we'd always walk back in from the bathroom. In this "big" house? Not so comfortable.

I walked her around and showed her each room. She loves ceiling fans. I hold my hand up and say, "breeze, breeze!" She giggles and then holds her hand up, too.

I knew I had to unpack and most importantly, wrap the gifts before Miss Boo, my three year old, came home. It was just impossible to do. So I took Britney up on her offer to come over and help if I needed her. I did!

She came over and we took turns entertaining Juna and unpacking at the same time. We had a lot of opened medication and I didn't want it laying around. Plus, I didn't want my three year old tearing into her presents. I wanted them wrapped!

Then Juna had her bottle and fell asleep. Britney left and I continued to unpack.

June Buggy woke up, had another bottle and was in high spirits. I called my mother, asking if she could please bring my girls over. Her reply? No, not now. Later. There's laundry in the dryer. Ok, how much later? Not sure, we'll call you.

I hung up and gave them a half of an hour. Juna and I were having fun in the TV room. What one item did she want to play with? A room filled with toys and she wanted the remote, of course.

Then I called back my mom. It was 4pm. She had just put the baby down for her nap. At 4pm! AHHH. I said nope, wake her up. I've been without my girls for two weeks, I cannot go another second. Plus, the baby's bedtime is 7pm, (what were you thinking?) but of course I did not say that. The woman did me a huge favor by watching my children for two weeks. But I'm home now and things are gonna change.

They arrived and of course the batteries were dead on the camera. I couldn't find new ones and didn't want to wake up my husband. So no reunion pics. We'll stage one tomorrow, how's that?

I went into the driveway and saw my three year old. She was so excited. Not to see me, but to see Juna. She hugged her and kissed her and told her she loved her a million times.

Then I went around to the other side to see the baby. Little Av took one look at me and burst into angry tears. Then for the rest of the evening, she wouldn't look at me. She wouldn't let me hold her. She became completely withdrawn, which is not like her bubbly self. She acted like an orphanage baby is supposed to act. Except she's my 6 month old biological baby. I was heartbroken. I held back tears, but I was just so so upset.

My orphanage baby? Happy as could be. She was thrilled with Miss Boo. Laughing and crawling to reach her. I stood her on her toes and Boo waved her arms around and Juna copied her every movement. It is true love between those two.

Little Av was also teething. Did mom give her Tylenol? No. No nap, no Tylenol. No wonder Av was not herself. And she's angry with us, that baby. You wouldn't think a six month old could have those feelings, but they do.

Plus, she looks so thin to me. Maybe it's from two weeks of staring at my robust 8 month old. But Av doesn't look healthy to me. My mother didn't give her any solids for two weeks for fear of upsetting her stomach. Like I said, I'm back, thank goodness. It's my way now.

My mom was anxious to leave and she handed me an angry Av. I sat on the floor with a baby who wanted nothing to do with me, a baby who was happily crawling onto me, and a three year old who was singing and dancing around the room. It hit me. They outnumber me. I've got this newly adopted baby, a teething and tired six month old, and a three year old who is bouncing off the walls. Each one going in a different direction or wailing, or laughing- depending on the kid. At that moment, I felt very very frightened. How was I supposed to DO THIS? The baby can't sit up on her own. The new baby can cruise the furniture. The three year old is doing cartwheels too close to their heads. I'm still jet lagged and exhausted. And that's when, slowly, each baby started breaking down, wanting a bottle. And my mother wants to bail while telling me, "I told you this wasn't going to be easy."


That's when my husband woke up. "I need a shower and haven't eaten in 24 hours."

help meeeeeeeeee!

And with that, Juna pooped.

As much as my heart was breaking over Av's unhappiness with me, and as overwhelmed and scared as I felt, I had to take action. I had to make a plan and make it work. I'm now the mom of "twins" and a three year old. But most importantly, I'M IN CHARGE NOW!!

1. Got on the phone and ordered a pizza and told husband to shower
2. Changed the babies and got them into their nighties
3. Got the big girl a brand new toy to play with- a present. A Chinese baby doll.
4. Made two bowls of cereal with applesauce and bananas
5. Made two bottles on stand by
6. Put the babies in the bouncie seats.
7. Husband fed one baby while I fed the other
8. Husband gave one bottle while I gave the other
9. Husband ate dinner while I got one baby to bed.
10. I ate while husband got the other baby to bed.
11. We both got the three year old ready for bed.

Everyone is asleep.

For now.

What a thrill to peek into the nursery to see two cribs and two sleeping babies. Two very different looking babies. One blonde American with blue eyes and the other Chinese with black hair and black eyes. Sisters. My girls!

As exhausted and scared as I feel, this is the job I signed up for. I might break down and cry each day, but I WILL DO THIS. I need a schedule. I need organization. I need wine. I need friends to call and say, "What was I thinking?" And knowing they won't judge me or think less of me.

This isn't going to be easy.

But I can do this.


jen said...

it's your first day! I still have those overwhelming moments with 2, but just like you said, I suddenly get up and take charge and things are okay again.

meowmix said...

YOU CAN DO THIS, and you will! And when did Av gets so big??? Didn't I just see her (in may...guess they grow fast, huh?).
WELCOME HOME! I think a GF trip is in order as soon as it drops below 90.

Valerie said...

If anyone can do this, it is you! You don't realize it but you will be awesome at love chaos, right? Well, here it is...good chaos to last a lifetime. Call me..I'm less than a mile away...seriously...CALL ME!! (not this weekend because I will be out of town)

Katie said...

I know you can do this. Good lord - look what you just got done with. The fact that you got all 3 to bed by 8 is blowing my mind. A little organization goes such a long way. BTW. I always have wine and am 10 mins. away.

AV looks so big to me too. She is a beautiful baby. I'm thinking you should save your fears for highschool with all 3.

Anonymous said...

"I told you this wasn't going to be easy." No kidding. We didn't think it was going to be easy. I think we had and have a realistic idea of what's ahead of us. We have every right to express fears, concerns, anxiety, and so on.

-your loving husband

Julie said...

Wow girl! I'm getting used to two-- I'm still very amatuer though...but in time we learn... I think your kids havea great mom :) yeah I gotta go number two just went number two on me :P